Love Commandos: Helping India’s love birds

Sanjoy Sachdeva

By Neeraj Nanda

The Love Commandos are a voluntary organization in India dedicated to helping India’s lovebirds who want to marry for love, opting for a “love marriage” instead of an “arranged marriage” according to their ‘Jati’ under the Indian caste system, religion or economic status. The fledgling organization is run out of a small room in inner-city New Delhi. Harsh Malhotra, a travel agent, founded the group in July 2010 after a series of murders of young lovers by their families. Indian society is liberalizing in many ways – but not about marriage, says Sanjoy Sachdev, who now runs the group. Most problems occur when there is love across caste lines, but a difference of religion is a close second, followed by a difference in economic class or education level. SAT Emailed a few questions to the organisation and got the following answers from Sanjay Sachdeva, Harsh Malhotra and others in the organisation.

Excerpts from the interview:

Q: Why did you setup the ‘Love Commandoes’?

A: It was decided to setup the ‘Love Commandos’ with the aim to counter fundamentalist and orthodox dictats of Khaps and other such elements. It is worth mentioning that Mr, Harsh Malhotra ( our Chief Co-ordinator) who gave the name ‘Love Commandos’ has made a world record in love by marrying his own wife six times. On the very first day of its foundation we received more than 7000 calls. Slowly we made a network of attending the calls and the mission continues. Subsequently, we received a call from Gandhians (Ganghig.com) who offered a free website and that website (www.lovecommandos.org) is still functioning.

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Q: What basically is your work?

A: We help people in love to get married, provide them counselling, legal assistance, free shelter, free food – medical assistance – sometimes clothes etc at the shelters. We undertake rescue operations as many females are kept in illegal detention. We also seek help from various authorities in such matters. We are under heavy debts. We have sold out our belongings to run the mission because in this country you may find hundreds of thousands who donate in the name of religion but it is tough to find people giving money to save these young kids. We ask the couples to bear actual expenses on their lawful marriages, registration (if desired), legal applications (No fee is generally charged by our lawyers), official process for protection or rescue. Shelter, food, medical assistance, beddings and sometimes even clothes are given free by us. We have no formal structure, no records as we are missionaries and not clerks. Anyone willing to be a volunteer can fill a form at lovecommandos.org or send an sms with his or her name and address to 09313784375.

Q: What type of people contact you?

A:We had been contacted and have helped engineers, doctors, advocates, professors, policemen, government officials, bank officials, MBAs and BCAs, MSW, sports personalities of national fame, people with families of political background, people with families of judicial background, rich nad poor people etc. from all religions and many of these cases have been reported. We honour the privacy of the couples and only those who are willing are brought before the media.

Q: Does the police or judiciary help you?

A:Generally we face problem in it. However, we are thankful to the Central Delhi District Police for always helping us in our lawful work, We are also thankful to NCW in many cases. The experience with the judiciary is a mixed one. Though the highest judiciary supports the cause it appears that the police and judiciary at lower levels are having their personal bias against the lovers. We have heard that many clans have announced rewards on the head of Mr. Sachdev and Mr. Malhotra totalling over Rupees 10 lakh. We never care about such unlawful opposition and continue to fight for justice to lovers.

Q: What are the main barriers in your work?

A: The general problem is of inter caste and inter religion marriages. However, same gotra, near relative, distant relative, financial position, educational status, family’s total opposition to love have also been causes and it has always been more difficult to handle such situations.

Q: Explain this.

A: Children are considered property. Now the youth of India is rising under the banner of Love Commandos and it shall change. It is correct that there are a lot who believe in arranged marriages even today but the nation is changing and now more and more youth are choosing their partners. Our laws are male dominated. Like the marriage age for male (21) should be more than a female. It should be 18 for both. When a boy can vote in elections at 18 why can’t he marry. The Indian Majority Act says the boy of 18 is a major but the Child Marriage Act says that till 21 he is a child whereas a girl of 18 is major.
The youth be it Hindu, Muslim, Sikh, Christian, Bauddhist, Jain, Parsi, Forward, Backward, SC, ST, OBC, male or female has a major problem that none in the society is sincere to them and none in the leadership is bothered about their basic common problem i.e. “the love problem”. Love sees no barriers of caste, creed or religion and the Hon’ble Supreme Court has stated that only such love marriages can save the country from disintegration.

Q: Describe the police response?

A: More shocking is that the entire Police in the country leave no stone unturned in terming each and every such case of killing or atrocity as a matter of personal rivalry. It is done by the police to keep its neck out of the gallows of the standing directions of the Supreme Court of India.
Our constitution gives right to choice to every male or female but it has been observed that whenever a female attempts to exercise her right she is called names, abused, her character assassinated, she is tortured physically, mentally and socially. They are illegally detained by parents and members of the family, their education or employment stopped and a number of other atrocities take place.
A large number of cases go unreported and even those that get reported are never attended to seriously by the police and administration. The police is expected to be protector of their rights and also to encourage such inter caste and inter religious relationships, but it is shocking that the police registers false cases against lovers, compels the females to appear in the local courts and thus endangering their lives, misbehaves with females in Love.

Q: Tell us about the problems faced by females?

A: Is a female only attacked in the name of rape? What about rape of her constitutional rights of choice marriage? Why are we silent on the basic issue? Thousands of females are illegally detained by their parental families. Thousands of youth in love are falsely implicated and fabricated by the families of females all over the country every day. Those going with their free will and choice are main targets. Though the Indian Supreme Court has in Criminal Appeal 958/2011 termed registration of such cases as abuse of process of law but even then the courts are loaded with many such cases.
The definition of Rape given in section 375 IPC carries different meanings including that there can be a wife of 12 years of age or a female of 16 years can consent to have sex. Further the Child Marriage Restrain Act is a living example of discrimination on the basis of gender. It is shocking that when a male of 18 years can play his role in deciding the fate of a government by using his right to vote, why he is not allowed to choose a life partner for himself at that age, whereas a girl is allowed. Such a law smells of male domination and needs that the marriageable age of both the Male and female should be 18 years.

Q: What are the Khap Panchayats etc. doing?

A: Despite the standing directions of the Apex court Khap, caste or Katta Panchayats are taking place. Declarations like banning small clothes by women, banning their free movement, banning use of mobile phones, banning their talking to males or being friendly with them etc. are there in the news every other week. Why is the administration silent on such undeclared rape of constitutional rights of females? We have been hearing that male partners of female sarpanches and panches are using or misusing the powers of their partners. Even election handbills carry the names of husbands or fathers on them, is that not a rape of their fundamental rights.

Q: What about honour killings?

A: Another important factor is of crimes and killings in the name of honour. Just a few days ago Abdul Hakim was killed in District Bullundshehar of UP. His widow is still fighting of justice. It is also important that such crimes and killings are an attack on the lives of females in question. May we take the liberty of suggesting that,” No case be registered under any section like kidnapping, rape, abduction etc. against any lover if both the boy and girl are major at that time and desiring to live together as husband and wife or in live in relationship, until and unless the girl herself makes such a complaint voluntarily and not under any legal or other guidance of her parents or so”.
The issue of protection of females in love is also important. May we suggest that if any female in love is requesting for protection either in writing, through phone, mobile, email, sms, telegram or with the help of any other individual or organization should be provided protection immediately after receiving such request and any police officer failing to ensure should be deemed to be unfit and such act be deemed as an act unbecoming of a public servant.

Q: People say you are destroying ‘Indian culture’ and promoting ‘Western culture’.

A: Culture is a vast word and it can never be destroyed. We are trying to make live the original culture of India and the institution of marriage was never against inter caste marriage. We are not promoting ‘western culture’ but in fact, the West has absorbed our culture long back which we have abandoned. Love Commandos is trying to bring it back.
Even our gods married in the same ‘gotra’ and that is why we support same Gotra marriages. Our Chief Co-ordinator Harsh Malhotra and his wife belong to same gotra ‘Kaushal’. How can the fundamentalists declare them brother and sister? We are attempting to bring back the glory of Indian culture.

Q: How can someone outside India help ‘Love Commandos’?

A: Those who support our cause can financially contribute to ‘Love Commandos’ by having our account details from www.lovecommandos.org.
– SAT NEWS SERVICE